It’s Time for a Self Love Revolution

Kalyani Roldan & Christine Arylo Madly In Love With Me

Kalyani Roldan & Christine Arylo Madly In Love With Me

Because the TRUTH is YOU ARE LOVE… but you have to CHOOSE to CLAIM it + IGNITE it in order to THRIVE it!

Today is February 13th the day before Valentine’s Day… what I know about Valentine’s Day is that it’s a day of deliberate shopping for all things shiny, red and romantic… oh yes and cuddly little teddy bears too…

it’s the one day of the year that we go the extra mile to show our sweetheart how much we love them by showering them with gifts proclaiming our love for them.

The Dictionary defines LOVE as an intense feeling of deep affection, a spectacular, indescribable, deep euphoric feeling for someone… which is precisely why I think LOVE has gone astray. And if you look up the synonyms you find words like compassion, appreciation, devotion, friendship, respect and passion just to name a few.

Love seems like an overused cliche word in our society… because people use it with such deminished regard… we say I love you and then we act in ways that are the exact opposite of and anything but those synonyms of LOVE.

So back to why we’re conversing about Valentine’s today on the 13th… today MOMs {Mentors of Magnificence} like myself and other women and gals of all ages all around the globe are celebrating OURSELVES… in honor of what my friend and colleague, Christine Arylo, whom I met in 2010 at her glorious experiential weekend in Northern California, Madly In Love With Me, has designated International Self Love Day

because if you don’t LOVE yourself to the amazing capacity that you’re TRULY capable of… how can you possibly REALLY love someone else?!?!

And more importantly… how can we be our abSOULute best MOM {Mentor of Magnificence} for our precious kiddos?!?!

the Radical Roldans International Self Love Day

And this is not to say that today on International Self Love Day is the only day to recognize and love yourself… of course not… it’s the reminder that Loving Yourself – from the inside out – is where it ALL starts… and that it’s time we make this a natural part of who we are.

Because the TRUTH is YOU ARE LOVE… but you have to CHOOSE to CLAIM it + IGNITE it in order to THRIVE it!

So it’s time for a…

International Self Love Day

This time in my life at the young age of 44… I totally underdstand what Oprah was talking about when she used to say the 50s are amazing!

Because it’s only since I stepped into my 40s that all the journey has truly unfolded before my eyes and my heart has opened wider than ever before and I really understand the fullness and beauty of life.

So this year I’m committed to a menage a trois of self love… yeah maybe I’ll actually try one of those too… but what I really mean is that I couldn’t choose just one area of self love for this personal party because for me self acceptance + self expression + self pleasure are so strongly interwoven in my life.

I’ve spent so much of my life not being excited for the unique body temple that God and I agreed was the perfect fit for me on this adventure and I compared myself straight into “I’ll never be good enough” to the point of having cosmetic surgeries trying to make aspects of my body measure up to my standards.

Now I’m not saying that I disagree with having cosmetic surgery cuz I’m still glad that I did some of them however even after doing them I still lacked love for myself and the ability to see my beauty.

I even look back a few years ago when I was thinner than I am today and I can remember being there in many moments wishing I weighed less than I did then. Now I get it that no matter the weight I was not loving myself and now I love and appreciate all the aspects of the body I’m blessed with even though it weighs more now… and yet as I write this… it’s miraculously letting go of all the unnecessary weight, because I realized that I no longer need to hide behind it to feel safe.

Like so many young gals as a teen I equated my ability to be loved in relation to how good or not I looked and since most of the time I couldn’t see + accept + value my own unique self then I didn’t believe that anyone else did either even when they told me otherwise.

I love this quote from one of my all time favorite movies, The Perks of Being a Wallflower –

“We accept the love we think we deserve.” – Stephen Chbosky

So stop accepting anything less {for and from yourself} than the magnificence you are!

I’ve always believed in my abilities and have been very successful in “accomplishing” the things I wanted in my life…but it was very much driven from the male energy, because I still lacked self acceptance, which translated to lack of self confidence to fully express myself.

And I hid for so much of my life behind the belief that I was shy even though deep down I really wanted to FEEL that self confident gal that could stand in front of a room of people inspiring and empowering… throwin’ down the truth of who we are!

We are Divine Goddesses!!

And we’re designed with female and male energy… that gives us the great joy of feeling sweet and sensual and also brings out the tigress in us… and when we embrace ALL of our SELF that’s when we feel fully alive.

It’s time for us to stop denying ourselves for whatever reasons we have so far… childhood traumas, relationship issues, responsibilities of motherhood…

So no more blaming outside elements or others… like I can’t trust or I don’t have time or the kids ran me ragged today or I’m too tired or relationships are not for me or it’s your fault ___ or why can’t you ___ or I just don’t have sex drive or whatever other crazy excuses we use to cut off our own pleasure of loving life.

These are collective consciousness that have permeated generation after generation and I for one will not tolerate it any more and I will not define and behave who I am from these models and mindset that obviously aren’t serving me or you or the raising of the collective energy of anyone else and therefore have me being less than who God designed me to be.

This wild adventure of truly loving myself has shown me time and time again that when I fully and joyfully accept and embrace that every experience of the journey is Divinely designed FOR me {not against me} and even more so that I can use them to propel me, that’s when I realized that I no longer need or want to CHOOSE reasons or excuses as to why I’m not giving myself the Ultimate Experience of loving all of me + being a sexy + savvy + successful woman fulfilled in every way from the inside out.

And paving the path by being the example for our young generations… giving them permission to love themselves as they are NOW!

And sometimes I tend to make this all sound so easy… and truthfully it is simple… but I’ve put my heart and soul into this process for years and it’s because of my dedication and commitment that despite what I’ve experienced I use it all to propel me in my life and I have the joy of being happily together with the Love of My Life, Darsana, for 20 years. And we have wonderful nurturing relationships with each other and our kick-ass kiddos!

That’s why we’re having a Virtual Self Love Party on February 20th sharing our secrets of success in both Love & Self Love. So please join us!

 Valentine 365 with the Radical Roldans

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Kalyani Roldan, MOMpreneur 

Catalyst for Happier + Richer + Freer Families

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